So as I am moving along this path, I get a little push from an unexpected place. One of my old high school friends called. I dated him briefly my senior year. I got him a job where we worked together 2 years. I managed 2 car wash/gas stations when I was 18-20.
He was tragically orphaned, loosing both parentd in an 18 month period. He had a lot of crap to work through, and is a nice guy now. Back then he was angry at the world. I used to have a standing date with him, every year we would drive over to Sacramento and I would help him pick out new clothes.
He still jokingly calls me "Mother Wendy". Anyway, he said he hates to know I'm in pain. And it has been more than a year. And the last time he spoke with my H (1997) he was alarmed at how "wooden" he was. My old friend thinks the militery changed my H......
And thinks I am not taking care of myself, I am putting everyone first and he wants to know when will I put myself first? So these are not new thoughts. They just sound different coming from my close friend.
He also gave me a pep talk about how he views me. (Genuine, outgoing, talented artist, caring.......) And he thinks I need to move somewhere where I can bloom.
My sister has also expressed that she wonders what I would be doing as an artist if I were free to do so.
Last night my H came home from the party. I ended up not going out, just didn't feel like watching folks get drunk. When he came in he said "Wha'ca watchin'? I said "The Mentalist". I didn't say anything else, didn't ask him to join me.
He came back through a few times, I kept quiet, he finally went to the other room and watched TV by himself. Later he came up and asked me how I liked the color he picked to paint the walls by the pool. I said it was nice.
This morning I slept in, and got up because I heard H banging around in the kitchen. I peeked out and he was cooking. He asked me did I want an omlette, and I said yes. (This is something he does about once every 6 months, makes us omlettes.)
I thanked him and am moving on with my day.
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
