First, the dinner and cupcakes was funny... until you pushed a bit and she said not to read into it... if you give her the idea and have no expectations, then maybe she will... one day... when she's "liking" you...
My W at one point offered to do things for me, like cut my hair (she used to buzz my hair every few months)... but she never did... and then... sometimes she would make banana bread "for the kids" and send it with them to visit me...
Also, my W still "volunteers" me for stuff without asking me first. It's uncomfortable to say no, but I'm just feeling like I have to be more firm with those boundaries.
A simple statement reminding them to ask first when those things come up might help. I don't know, I don't have enough experience yet to know it's working for me.
