Outside the Scope of This Report Part 3

[WenikiTiki]

So as I was headed out one of my friends called and asked me to meet her for lunch. So I lifted weights and then met her for lunch. Nice break. She and I have abusive mothers in common, which we sometimes talk about.

It is one of those topics that folks who grew up differently just don't understand. We don't harp on it, just understand each other better. I did a ton of thereapy to not ever be like my mom.

And the most important thing I know is my mom didn't choose to be that way. She had a horrible father, and her father had a horrible father. That was my perspective since I was about 30 and went into therapy. It is what kept me going back!

But I think I have lost myself in all this worrying to be the best mom I can be. My children have both expressed that they want to live near me. They want me in their lives.

I got away from my parents as soon as I could. And joined the military. Pretty much a greart excuse to be far away. I go visit my mom. But can never stay long. She is doing therapy herself, finally at age 76! She is making progress.

So I guess I need to just pick a course and get on it. I also packed up my go bag again. The absolute moment I feel the overwhelming urge to talk to H about anything I will jet out of here. Starbucks?

I loaded up the freezer with 2 each of 8 different frozen dinners. And I bought his other essentials. He can eat whatever he wants, whenever he wants it. There is also stuff to make regular meals, so plenty of choices.

I also wanted to say to kml that I heard what you said about maybe the house is more important to H than I know. And I was thinking that maybe he is actually a little over-sensative in that area.

Whenever I tell friends that he is complaining about the house they fall over laughing. Once a group of 25 of us were headed out sailing for a Christmas party. The weather turned to crap and we were near my house. I invited everyone over, and all I had to do was call my son and ask him to vacuume up the leaves on the Lanai. (That the darn dogs drag in for doggie fun....)

I think he is just doing that thing MLC folks do and making me the bad guy however he can. And I just need to not let myself get so wrapped up in his brand of crazy.