You can play devil's advocate. My goal is to get some distance from him. He wants to act like nothing is different, eat our meals, me continue to what I have always done, him to do what he wants.
I have always kept the house nice. When you hear about moldy furniture and dog barf, it sounds like I haven't done anything in ages. The house is 3800 sf, plus a huge lanai and carport. And one acre of jungle. It is actually a full time job to keep up. I was just in the room with the mold the other day, because I had to clean up rainwater that flooded in the windows. I think that is where the mold came from.
I am a good housekeeper, that isn't the problem. The problem is that my H sees only the bad and never the good. If he doesn't see something happen it didn't happen. I actually pondered making a big change and not do any housework unless he was home.
I do know I can't go on the way I am. The house, housework and my H all give me horrible anxiety.
I think me just doing a better job of GALing would be the best answer. My long term goal is to have him turn back into a guy I can love. And for him to love me. But I am really having a hard time seeing that happen.
I will think some more on this!
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
