Starsky asked me about an update and it's something that I've been wanting to do for quite a while. I've always wanted my journal here on this board to be something that I could go back to someday to remind myself of everything that I went through, and am still.
Here are a list of my previous threads. I have been reading through them the past few nights to remind myself, to see how far I have come with my efforts to reconcile my M, and to see how far I have come as a person.
I will update in my next post, but in sum, things are very positive between my W and I right now. She is truly trying to get herself to a place where she can commit to reconciling our M. She suggested a marital retreat in Colorado Springs and we did go weekend before last. She has expressed her desire to reconnect with her religious roots. She is talking of moving home when her current lease expires in July. OM is still lurking, but W is at a point where she is very willing to talk to me about what the status of that is. She has stated that she knows that he is trying to manipulate her into changing her mind on her "decision". She tells me that she ignores his calls and texts, and that he knows that she is trying to avoid him. All that said, there is still a lot of emotional turmoil for her surrounding this.
For anyone interested, here is the hell that I have been through over the past 15 1/2 months. This is more for me to be able to go back someday and remember. But there are tons of posts from vets, BITS, and others, that I know can help others here on this board.
1. Hopeful but Distressed. Denver's initial, desperate, post here on this board.
2. Need Advice and Support to keep Hope. Lots of whining by Denver as he was going through the initial stages of S with W, learning what DB was, and learning what he needed to do.
4. I WILL Attain my Goals - Personal and M. Denver learning about unconditional love and setting goals for himself. First time Denver hears that he might have a chance to R M.
7. The unexamined life is not worth living. Denver dusts himself off, learns more about unconditional love, learns that this process takes tremendous time and patience. He moves forward.
15. 75 Days. More of the same. Deep down, Denver knows that a fall is about to come. He continues to try and hold onto something that he has no control over.
21. Will This Ever End? Denver's W tells him that she misses OM. But Denver has trip to Disney with W. About trip to Disney. W calls Denver 'sweetie' and 'honey'... good. Denver finds emails between W and OM... bad. Denver begins to realize that he has no control over any of it.
22. Just Be. Denver hits point of exhaustion. W tells Denver that she is not ready for R. Denver contemplates dating OW. Denver contemplates being done. Begins no contact, again, with W.
24. WTF? W angry about OW. W continues to increase contact with Denver. Denver sends W email telling her that he does not want contact until OM is gone for good.
25. WTF?!?!? Artpay Otway. Denver has very little contact with W. W goes through anger phase. Then begins to initiate contact. On Sept 1, 11, W texts Denver that she is thinking of him. Last update.
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
