I'm soo sorry you have had a rough month. The things that you are going through with your husband sound horrible. My heart aches for you.
LA gave alot of good advice. I wanted to add in regards to a couple specifics.
I hope the board doesn't mind .
Originally Posted By: keep_going
But what if I am just letting myself be guided by my hurt, anger and what everyone else is saying? Is this the right thing? The Christian thing to do?
I asked myself the same questions in January. I couldn't tell if I was being co-dependent or Christian. I couldn't tell if I was angry or FINALLY sticking up for myself.
I was going in circles.
I remember one morning being in the shower and I just started weeping and I told God.. that I just didn't know.. that I needed guidance and I was so confused in my heart and head that I couldn't go another step until he told me what to do....
.... and that he better hit me over the head with the answer cause I love my wife very much so anything that I may "perceive" as being harmful to her.. I wouldn't do.
So I went dark.....
.... and I fasted....
... and prayed.....
...and fasted some more...
.... and prayed some more...
and after 21 days.. I finally got my answer. I did not like it too much, but by handing it over to God... I did get some peace.
And that's what I would suggest to you.
Hand your marriage over to GOD.
That doesn't mean that you get to walk away.. that doesn't mean the next steps won't be hard.
That doesn't mean that some days you won't want to take over the reigns.
.... it just means to have FAITH....
... to have faith that God Loves you more than we can ever comprehend... more than your H.
... and he knows what's best for us.
.... and like any good father... will allow hurtful things in our life so we can become the people he wants us to be.
So if that means that you are not supposed to be with your H at this time, it's for the best.
It sukks.. and that statement alone will test your faith.. because of YOUR selfish wants...
which makes total sense to me and I can relate.
But as 25 says.. let Go and let God...
... and if you still fear that your are emotions are getting in your way.. pray about it.
Seriously.. when I was afraid that I MIGHT be doing something out of anger, I prayed... alot..
and God either gave me peace or brought me someone in my life to put me in check.
He will for you too..
.... enough rambling for now.
(((( )))
M(f): 40 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
