Giving up ML when it's something you want is like cutting off your nose to spite your face, don't you think? That might go for the hugging before sleep as well.
I completely get the difficulty of your sitch. I do wonder, is the withdrawal really what you want? I would relate it to a friend that never calls you, and you're always calling them. It's not right, but if you enjoy the friendship, is it still worth it? Would the principle of them not ever calling you be worth dropping the friendship?
I sort of feel like that's where you are with your wife. You did have skypes and ILY's everyday. Now maybe 2-3 times with her initiating. Is that a success? You used to have a 6-second hug am/pm but now you don't. Is that good? Her not initiating it may be a blow to the ego, sure. But it's not rejection, just lack of initiation. If you recognize that that is just "her," then I'm not sure you're doing yourself any favors.
