This is going to sound funny but I have an update since yesterday. I found out the truth - my H was fooling around with a coworker for the past 3 weeks, in their cars. Really disgusting. I spoke to both of them. They both say they didn't have "sex" but he admitted they were intimate. She only called me back because I threatened to tell her boyfriend of 2 decades. (I still really want to tell him). My H has since called me, crying and apologizing, and sounds like he's having a nervous breakdown. He said he's going to end it with her today and that he led her to believe he had feelings for her when he didn't. He said he didn't know why he did what he did. I was surprisingly calm, and thanked him for being honest finally. I told him that he could continue to see her if that's what he chose, but I want no part of it. If there was ever a chance for a future together, there would need to be NC. Period. They work together so I really don't know how it will play out. I'm trying not to have expectations, but what I really want to do is go down there tonight and tell the whole place, and see who she is and yell at her - and make them both feel bad. (yeah right). The sad part is that I don't want it to reflect badly on my H. Maybe because I don't want it to make me look bad. It also might sound horrible to say that I'm kind of enjoying that he's in pain. Maybe it will make him realize what he's done. Anyway, I wanted to ask for some feedback or advice from the forum - two things: where do I go from here with my H? As of now he's not living here, and I don't want him to think this is ok and all is forgiven. It's not. But I don't want to D if I don't have to, and if things improve.
Secondly, I don't know if I should pursue telling her partner? She's beside herself about that, and I have to say I really don't care. I feel like she participated in hurting not only me, but her partner - and according to my H, she thinks they're going to be together. (her and my H). I don't want to do anything that will backfire on me, but I really want to be firm and strong. Right now I'm dying to text her that she's going to pay for this.
