My husband is an alien!

[BeingMe]

I agree ... detaching is the best thing to do. I was what helped me, ultimately. Just make sure you are safe, financially. He should not be paying for OW on family money. Until you are separated or divorced, his money is your money too.

In the meantime, GAL, meet new people, get out and about, even if it's to the gym. If he gets argumentative, walk away. If he leaves, then get a S agreement in place ASAP, so that you know where you stand financially. Believe me, it gets worse before it gets better. I maintain that the better a marriage was, the worse the MLCer will treat the LBS. They will be afraid of the needless pain they put you through, and will make all the justifications they can think of for having the A, and/or leaving.

Listen for "the kids are resilient, they'll be okay" or my "favorite" history revision "I've never been happy", "we should never have gotten married". Blah Blah Blah. The strangest lies and denials will come out of his mouth, things that are alien to your loving H, the one you married. So, detach, put on your safety belt and gear up for quite a ride. I am not trying to scare you, just warning and preparing.

I hope I'm going to be wrong. Good luck!