I have said this before but it's clear you really truly get it--the more we challenge the WAS's choices,
the more they'll defend them or rationalize them or just get mad at you for questioning them.
Hence backing off and really truly moving forward. Seeing the "positive side" of letting go also helps (ahem, your s13 wearing ear plugs...I bet NOT seeing that won't hurt you).
And there are other positives that of course are stronger, which I think you sense Rick.
Your choice is NOT between your wife, or being alone the rest of your life.
Even if it were, might you choose being single, over being married this way?
This is a reality they created, that you are facing and making the most of.
Even though I love to think my own detaching and GAL was the trigger for my h coming around,
maybe it was all about h realizing he was living alone and
waking up to that fact finally, on the tundra, and the reality that WE lived here, while HE lived there...
Whether it was change in HIM or ME, or both, isn't relevant that much b/c
Either way, MY path was the same. I had to let him go and make myself happy.
As you have discovered Rick, when we make ourselves happy, well, we make ourselves happy.
and Isn't that the point of Living well?
Waiting or hoping THEY change, or wake up, is just not a viable option!!
Making ourselves content, GAL like a maniac, moving forward, taking care of our kids and ourselves...isn't that what we are here on earth for anyhow?
When we put aside our anger & our pain for a minute, we may just see
that the silver lining of all this is realizing this was the way we were
supposed to be living & where our focus was supposed to be, all along.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
