When it's a one-way street...part 4

[2thepoint]

That is the point I was at when I started posting -- in the other bedroom, refusing to have sex, refusing to go to dinner with him, etc. etc. Those were my boundaries. Obviously, that doesn't make for a happy, healthy M. The advice in DB and to my posts was to reengage, give him another chance "to shine."

Now what?

CV, I see how frustrated you are and I honestly can't blame you for feeling the way you do. What sane person wouldn't feel the same way, all things considered? What I would offer is that the things you have been doing to reengage appear to be noticed by your H as you have stated in previous posts.

The thing I think you should probably consider is that the things you are doing need to continue for your actions to take root and be believed to be long term by your H. This may or may not result in changes in your H but only time will tell. If your H sees and believes your loving actions to be permanent, he may be more inclined to listen to you about what you need out of your R with him.

I know based upon your posts that you don't think he is capable, and you may very well be right. I'd just try to stick to those activities that are getting a reaction from your H for a longer period of time before throwing in the towel.

Think of it like a drop in a gallon bucket. A single drop of water doesn't seem like much, but given sufficient time, the bucket eventually fills. Can you keep filling the bucket?

BTW when are you going to EE?