Brand New here, my story, my ?'s

[Ichrus]

Slept ok last night, work up a few times with mind just going and my elbow joints were tense and sore this morning (maybe stressed in the night somehow), but got some shuteye. Dragging a bit today, and the time change did not help.

Wife came home this morning early to get ready, first thing she said was she was exhausted. I think i responded with a simple affirmative "hmm", she followed with something like "I will probably pass out driving to work today", I decided to really not respond and we both just went about getting kids and selves ready for the day. I maybe should have tried to be validating and upbeat, but just felt she was baiting the trap and wanted to get into it and I was not going for it. At one point she walked by and said "Don't think I am going to make this easy for you"...so I expect we will have an interesting night/talk later.

I am a little worried and upset about this all, but also think I have a decent "shield" of detachment as well (which I will likely need tonight). My position is that I am not (and have not) demanded or even really asked that she do anything (move out, sleep on the couch, etc.), she is the one choosing to leave our M and her being uncomfortable being around me is her problem, not mine. I don't plan on leaving our bed or our house on any regular basis because she doesn't like being around me (But will spend some evenings or days away to give her space and time, just not going to be sleeping on the couch or at my brothers on some regular schedule). Her position is that I am being stubborn and "bull-headed", that because I make more money and will likely be the one to keep the house for our girls sake, I am saying it has to be some certain way (basically that I am not giving in to her wish/demand that I move out and sleep elsewhere certain days of the week).

So tonight should be interesting. Have a D end of basketball event tonight, then just normal time with the girls, after they start heading to bed I hope to hit the gym to give us both some more space and time...then we will see. I certainly will need to slip into the flame proof suit before getting home, detachment helmet on as well, and anger/snarky response filter in place on the mouth. I am starting to get a bit worried about her emotional state and what she might do (not harming herself or the kids wise), but beginning to have visions of her locking or barricading the bedroom door at night to get her way or something. Will just have to see what happens and play it by ear, but I am already running thru a few visions of things she might do and the most appropriate way to respond.

Wish me luck!