Thank you to everyone on these boards. It is incredibly valuable to read stories similar to mine with accompanying advice and thoughts and intentions and to see how they progress and what happens. There are two things about my sitch that I have not yet found specifically dealt with that I would love some specific thoughts about. First, time is usually on the side of the DBer. I am a little anxious that it is not on my side, in that we are considering moving after this school year. I have a very strong support system here in our new city. Community is very important to me and I always work to develop friendships at church, etc. W is introverted and for 3 years has only developed 2-3 close(ish) friendships in our new city. She travels a lot for her hobby that she is passionate about and sorta sustains itself. (I have encouraged/supported her in it for years). That's where OM came from, and most of her social connections. She keeps in contact every day with lots of those friends online/facebook, but she isn't close to anyone here. Kids aren't really rooted here. They spend lots of time at their grandparents (both sides) and would really be excited to move back there, where they also have 4 cousins. I have tried to encourage all of them to develop relationships locally, but honest assessment of where we stand is I have made a new life here and the rest of my family feels lonely here. But because of D laws and residency, etc., this puts a fire under my spouse to get this thing done. I am so worried that four months from now I will be divorced and completely lost (if we move) or abandoned (if I don't). I trust that DB works, but what if I cannot wait it out? I am ready to change and let W see over time, but what if I don't have time?
