This is the latest epiphany. I married my wife "till death do us part." I made that commitment to my wife before God and our community, and I will honor it. Yes, even if she divorces me and marries another man. Yes, even though I've dishonored those vows in the past. In June, we will get to a crossroads. We have talked about moving "back home" for family support (no doubt OM living there is a factor). I really do think if D happens, then that will be best for the kids. Second option, I could say here is my job, me and kids are staying here. I foresee this creating a very nasty reaction in her (not that that is a reason not to). Third option, I could say, take the kids. I have some stuff to work on (in addition to making money). I will move there when I am ready to be the man my family needs. Whether you take me back at your husband at that time will be up to you. This could go a few ways. Either it starts us on the long road towards R while she waits to see me change. Or she could make OM a growing part of her life while I diminish. As I said before, I will not let anything happen before we have a clear agreement. But that almost gives her the advantage of time; we approach a fork in the road with no plan.
