So, I retained the lawyer today, to protect myself. It was painful as hell but I can't afford to "bury my head in the sand". This is killing me and who knows...maybe down the road it willget better. But right now, since he won't talk to me at all, I HAVE to do this the legal way.
He has taken off the ring and won't discuss anything with me so I need to move forward since that is what he is doing. I still don't plan on giving up. If anything I need to work on me and maybe, one day, he will see what he is missing out on.
I told him about retaining the lawyer and he got really pissed and started calling me stupid [censored] and [censored] and lashing out that all I'm doing is creating more debt when he can just file the paperwork thru a paralegal and we can have everything split down the middle. What he doesn't know is my mother paid for it.
In any case, he wanted me to fire the lawyer and deal with his people but since he won't discuss anything with me, I have to do what's right for me..and doing it thru a lawyer, I believe, is the right way. It still kills me inside though.
I will deeply think about having a Plan A and B. Ultimately, I do want us to be together and by changing the way I am, I am trying to be a better person. Hopefully things will get better. If for anything else, for my sanity and emotional well being.
