Tad, The music didn't have a thing to do w/what happened to your xw. It's time to tackle that fear and come to realize that music can actually soothe the soul. I understand where you are coming from, but you have to remember that what happened to your xw happened a very long time ago when she was a child. Music didn't create her problems.
The things that your xw has told your son about you and cheating...in her mind, she believes it, even if it didn't happen. Their reality becomes distorted in many ways.
I'll give you a some of examples of what my xh told his lawyer which are quite funny now, but weren't at the time. My xh told his lawyer that I had knocked him unconscious, tied him up and held him hostage for two days. My xh is taller than I am and weighed in at that time at 250. There was no way that I could over power him like he said. Another comment was that I took all of his clothes and placed them in the middile of the driveway and set them on fire. This didn't happen because he had all of his clothes when he made that comment and besides my driveway is blacktopped. The PI confirmed that this didn't happen. One last example and then you can laugh. He came by the house one day while I was home and told me that he had rented a room from a man. The man had told him that he could put his dishes up in the cabinet. The xh told me that he said "I only have my coffee cup." He also told me that he slept on the floor because he didn't want to mess up the bed. My xh was very serious when he told me his tale of woe. He also wouldn't rent a particular house because it didn't have Anderson windows and another house had a broken intercom system. Tad, they honestly believe this stuff even if it's not true.
You've come a long way and I'm proud of you. You still have a ways to go, but I promise you, things will get easier as your continue your journey.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
