Came home and as soon as I saw H the dam broke. Get your 2x4s, 6x8s, & 8x10s ready.
I told him I wasn't sure how to say this so I was just going to say it. I told him that I was having a hard time with the amount of disrespect he is showing me by cheating on me basically in my face. That the person I married was someone I thought would not do that. I told him that while he may disagree nothing I have ever done warranted him cheating on me. I said I'm sure OW wouldn't agree either. I said but I'm sure he told her a completely different story than what we were living. Because happily married people don't cheat. He says Happily married? I said "I" thought we were happily married. I dudn't know what he was because he wasn't talking to me.
I told him I've been trying to deal with our sitch and believe our M can work, but it's hard when he's knowingly cheating and hurting me and doesn't seem to care. He said he does care and I don't deserve this. That he's struggled with his A. He says he knows I'm thinking so why not give it up? I said basically, but he had no reply.
I told him I still believed in our M and thought we could work, but having a hard time with the blatant disrespect. I said that was it and left the room to go cry. He hears me in the bathroom (with the fan on) and calls to me. I finally pull myself together. He's just sitting on the bed looking at me. I tell him he can go to the store like he was on his way to. That I'll be fine...like I always am.
He just went to the store to get buns. He's probably wondering what he's coming back to. I just couldn't hold it in any longer. Now to get thru the rest of tonight...I can't stop crying.
