i have come to really appreciate this forum i know all the 37 rules following them is hard but i really do try to stick to them i have not really talked to her. i left before she showed up to take her things and when she text's me i keep it very simple usually yes or no.
i do really appreciate the fact that she left the blanket i know it sounds stupid but my cat really does love it and i know its her blanket.. she took everything else that is hers so it was nice that she thought about our cat. i didnt send anything and ill continue to just not talk to her.
my job search is pretty much anything customer service although the few interviews i have had lately as much as i try to seem my normal upbeat self i think the depression is showing through.
i have taken up exercise and i do some form every day.
i go to school monday and wed. and when im there im usually pretty good.
im just really trying to detach right now its my main focus i dont even want any hope that we will get back together right now because all it does is keep me attached. the thought of her and another guy while im still attached to her kills me and i just really want to be moved on before it gets to that. I woke up like 5 times last night because of dreams of her and another guy. I cant live like that....
my anxiety has always been there but this whole thing has kicked it into overdrive. dealing with it and the depression is my biggest challenge. I know i can overcome it without medicine so i refuse to take drugs for it. i have thought about a therapist but i feel like talking to anyone helps enough (especially my grandmother) so i don't have the desire to pay for talking. if it gets bad enough ill consider it.
