Suddenly Separated in VA -- need your help

[purgatory]

My H left me b/c of my anger issues... I spent a year in C to figure where/why/ what to do about them. The biggest 'trick' that she taught me is the 24 hour rule. It goes like this: when you feel a need to respond to something H says or does, you have to muster up all your strength and STFU! Walk away. You MUST wait 24 hours before saying anything about that topic. During that time, journal, go for long walks, come here to the boards: do whatever helps you calm down and get it out of your system- but not to him! After the 24 hour period, you will have noticed one of two things:
1. Either you realized that the issue wasn't that big of a deal and you've moved passed it
2. Or, it's still something you want to talk about- except now you are no longer functioning in your emotional brain. So you are able to talk to him rationally and calmly.

This was a Turing point for me in how I relate to H and everyone. After almost a 8 months of practicing this, I don't have to wait 24 hours anymore. I can 'feel' when my body/brain is reacting emotionally and I can consciencely get myself into my rational brain.

I originally posted this I Rick89's thread (I think) about 3 months ago. He said it helped him a lot. Just another tool for you to try