Last week, I got chastised because my sense of urgency translated into "hounding" my husband for an email he was going to send.
Yes.
It was not because of what you were doing, rather HOW you were doing. And SBT type suggestions on how to do it differently were offered.
Did you change how you were presenting to your H?
If so, how were the responses of your H different?
If not, why not?
Originally Posted By: Crazyville
...I've gotten chastised by KD for not answering every question, that I'm somehow intentionally withholding.
Yes, I did ask you to answer every question.
I am not asking you to come up with the RIGHT answers. I am asking you to come up with AN answer.
What that entails is, making a choice. If we won't make a choice, then we are avoiding making a choice (or rather, we are choosing to continue to stay stuck; or put another way, we are choosing to stay in "planning" mode).
This goes back to "confident expectations".
Funny thing... people walk done the street every day and trip over a curb, stair, whatever... we TRUST that our feet will take us there. We ignore the reality that our feet may fail us. Yet we do, anyhow.
If we accepted the reality that we might fall, would that stop us from making a choice to walk?
If I want to start a business, I can sit and think about it. I can say, "I don't know how to start. I don't want to do this, I don't want to do that, I want to think about this. I want to plan this, because I don't want to do it wrong (which is the SAME as saying I want to do it right)."
When the reality is, when we want to start a business, we start doing business. We get a phone number. We get an address. We open a bank account. We send out marketing and advertising.
If we do not do these things, then we are not doing business.
It could be the wrong phone number. It could be the wrong address. It could be the wrong bank. It could be poor quality advertising.
But we won't know, unless we do. So we choose to do and we start doing and we observe and we course correct.
But the first choice HAD to be made. We had to choose AND COMMIT to starting and operating a business.
Originally Posted By: Crazyville
Your challenge: Current reality: My H carries strong feelings for his college sweetheart. My problem: I don't know how to have a healthy M when there's another "love," especially when reality can never compete with fantasy. SBT: Tell me one specific thing I should do this minute, proactively or in response to the question, and the intended goal behind the action, what to observe, and potentially what to adjust.
The solution to the above is, become an attractive option. Not in a competitive way. Rather, become a woman that only a fool would leave. Your H may or may not be that fool.
The question before the plan is, are you prepared to do what it takes to be the BEST option for ANY man, even if you fail to keep your H?
Answer that question and then we can plan accordingly.
