Detached, but not Broken-a diary of a LRT

[Broken74]

Thanks labug, Barely, and Yas

Yeah it's a deep hole and I'm not sure if I want to crawl out or not. STFU is certainly what I should've done and what I am doing now. I'm going to have to disagree that any of my statements were abusive. I was being honest with the trophy wife comment, if I wanted a trophy wife, I woudn't have picked her, 100% honest, I didn't say that to be mean this is fact. It's also ridiculous that she thinks I married her for that reason. Also, when she spouted off about engaging with other man prior to the affair partner I found out about, instead of investing that energy into our marital problems, my comment about keeping her stuff in her pants holds much water. Should I have said these things? Obviously not I was angry, but are either of them verbally abusive? I don't think so. If someone weighs 700 lbs and they are called fat is that verbally abusive? No, politically incorrect yes but verbally abusive no. If calling a spade a spade is verbally abusive then maybe I have a life sentence.

I appreciate your comments on the kids, I want to point out a couple of things that may show my of train of thought in this area, as in the realm of a positive male role model in their life, I was it.

1) SS1 was born when my W was 14. He has never met his father whom is incarcerated for shooting someone in the back during a robbery attempt. Obviously no support or in the picture whatsoever.
2) SS2 and SD father is also a deadbeat, has two other children by two other women whom he also provides no support. This dude left my W bankrupt after her 1st marriage.
3) I come along, pull this ridiculously broken home up by it's bootstraps, help my W out of bankrupcy, build a new house so for the first time in their lives these children don't have to share a room. This move ALSO allows my wife to get full custody of SS2 and SD for the first time. If it were not for my actions she would not have gotten full custody of her kids. She even made mention of this in her early conversations with the other man which is sickening.

So I knew going in that I would always be fourth on the totem pole, like what you were saying. This couldn't be more clear to me now.

As far as my train of thought is concerned, it's off the tracks at the moment. Based on her threat I am obviously going dark for now. She's still driving a car that I own and I hope that I don't get screwed in this regard. If the past behavior holds true she will reach out to me in the next couple of weeks after she cools down. You guys are right in that I am angry, my anger based on her statements on Tuesday is what put me in this situation, I should have taken a time out. I'm afraid there is just too much water under the bridge now to recover, she has been saying that for some time.

And the drama continues, hopefully Cheryl will have some constructive feedback during our call this afternoon. Thanks again for you guys feedback and good luck in your respective sitch's!