I am realizing that my fear of ever losing her led me to be very passive in the relationship, which I perceived it as being laid back and easy.
Oh yeah, that was me. Because of infidelity on his part early in our marriage, I was always under a little cloud even when our marriage was very good. I'm pretty easy-going anyway, and he was very high-maintenance, so I it was easy for me to just go along, justifying that whatever it was mattered more to him than to me anyway, so why not go along?
But I can see now that there was also a tiny undercurrent of fear of loss, that probably kept me from asserting my needs as much as I should have. And in the end, he didn't respect me for that.
