I'm so sorry for this recent blowup. Please remember that he nor his lawyer can force you to do anything...this is a matter for a judge to decide if you two cannot agree (with the assistance of your attorney of what is fair and reasonable), and in my opinion the financial situation needs to be addressed immediately. He may not be willing to provide you with financial information, but a court can force him to.
Why do you think he made a big production of emptying the car and calling a cab? Do you think he is trying to frighten and/or bully you? Also, have you answered his emails? If I were in your shoes (and I have been), I would not answer him, as I don't believe you owe him an answer. I would call my lawyer ASAP, inform him/her of what is going on and let them take care of it. Then I would suggest to your husband when he emails/calls/texts/shows up again that when he has financial questions (or demands, in his case), to have his lawyer contact yours.
There are many consequences to ending a marriage, and some extra financial burden is one of them. Some people have to learn the hard way that divorce doesn't make all the problems go away.
I'd like to add that I agree with OT that you didn't owe your husband any thanks for attending an event he should have been happy to be at anyway.
