Triggers are clues that set off unpleasant memories. Like PTSD. It could be anything from something visual, to a certain sound or song, smell, taste, etc.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
My triggers with H are - his devilish grin that he gives when he's flirting - his cologne - seeing him be tender and loving with our kids
Is is possible to have PTSD from a divorce? I'm beginning to think so
M-31, H-31 T-9, M-7 S-6, s-20mth sep 8/1/11 ILYNILWY 11/29/11 Creating separation papers. Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12 H moves out 1.20.12
Mrbond u got it! Very very unpleasant memories. N purg- I wish those were the triggers I am dealing with.
I remembered a something he told me and suddenly remembered a pix I found of him n OW stating the opposite. Took me 2 mos to realize he lied! Things have been going really well between us as far as getting along. Today I told him about another trigger and he said, there will be a time, not now, when I can tell you more. WTH??? Tell me more Yoda!!
It was his dads bday today. He took the kids to his moms and I went over after. It was nice. On the drive home,S3 kept asking for him. "where's papi? Where are the other papi's?" I said, your uncles are with your cousins. He asked again for him in bed so I called him n told him S3 missed him.
He got a tattoo shortly after I discovered the affair. Tomorrow he want S3 to go and watch them complete it. I'm not against tattoo! I'm against his because I associate it with him MLC!
M 42 H 39 T10 (-2yrs separation) S8 D5 DD 7/30/11 (EA&PA) Reconciled 6/2013 Separation in works 1/2017
Today he wanted me to go see him finish off his tattoo. I never thought I hated tattoos until the father of my kids got one! I called friends w tattoos cuz I needed support. One said that I have no control what he does. Also, it's a good thing he got it as an adult so that our kids see that if they really want one they should wait. And they also said, there are worse things in life than tattoos! True! Leaving ur family is on the top of that list!!
Ok! Be positive! He wanted us there. His family! Then he wanted us to meet him at his parents and hang out. Then he called 10 min after I drove off to see how we're doing. Weird. Then left a text cuz my cell battery ran out saying he's been calling. Ok... I called back 30min later (10pm) n got voicemail.
On fri he said, we should go to the mall on Sun. I'll pick u guys up. I said ok. Very nonchalant. We don't need anything from the mall but S3 likes to ride the train n carrousel.
M 42 H 39 T10 (-2yrs separation) S8 D5 DD 7/30/11 (EA&PA) Reconciled 6/2013 Separation in works 1/2017
I wanted to start this thread so that ppl can post they're positive responses from their significant others. It's so important not to have expectations so it's a real bonus when they do something unexpected.
My bonus* he came over this morning to help me feed S3 breakfast while I showered. He wasn't going to come over til after his spin class. . I think it helped that I acted as if the nite before and we had a good time at his parents Next...
M 42 H 39 T10 (-2yrs separation) S8 D5 DD 7/30/11 (EA&PA) Reconciled 6/2013 Separation in works 1/2017
love this new thread! What a great way to remind us to focus on the positives, as little as some may be.
M-31, H-31 T-9, M-7 S-6, s-20mth sep 8/1/11 ILYNILWY 11/29/11 Creating separation papers. Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12 H moves out 1.20.12
More! Last nite my cell battery died when I charged it he left me a text "Ive been calling u guys for a while now. Ur cel goes directly to vm and the house phone is on fax mode. Everything ok?" uh, yeah... I'm at home w ur two kids!?? Lol. So we talk and he says "I'll go pick up the kids in the morning. How about we go to breakfast before I take them." wowowowowow!! Even if it doesn't happen, this is big!!! Many many
M 42 H 39 T10 (-2yrs separation) S8 D5 DD 7/30/11 (EA&PA) Reconciled 6/2013 Separation in works 1/2017
Not sure these count, but here we go: 1. H was wearing his wedding ring today when he went out. Has not worn it much this week, if at all. 2. H came back from running his errand and seemed concerned/annoyed that he had tried to call me on his way back and the phone went straight to VM. (I was posting here) 3. H just "made" me take some Tylenol for my headache. Literally watched me swallow them. Joked that he wanted to make sure one didn't fall down my cleavage. LOL Asked if I needed anything else.
. I think it helped that I acted as if the nite before and we had a good time at his parents