37 year old virgin!

[lea74]

I know I know - I shouldnt be feeling so down. I dont have a right - there are people in far worse situation then.

I guess the idea of yet another weekend all alone just got to me. I also dont think it is just the alone thing. It is all the stresses getting to me as well, especially regarding money. As of last december my xH decided he can no longer pay child support and there is nothing I can do about it. Yet somehow he has just taken my kids on a skiing trip with private ski lessons and then will again in April and another trip abroad in May and a two week holiday to Italy in the summer.(This is all paid for by his new wife) Dont get me wrong I dont begrudge my kids anything - in fact I am really glad that they are able to get to do all these amazing things. It just [censored] that I get to do all th boring stuff e.g. homework, school runs, dentist appointments, hormonal teenagers etc. (My xH lives in switzerland so flies in every 2nd to have my sons for the weekend.) I kinda would also like to do some exciting things with my kids.

I guess the idea of being with someone was exciting and a break from my own routine and something for me that reminded me that I am more than a mom but a woman too!!

Anyway enough of the self pity and time to get of pity horse.

GMom, I took your advice and have arranged to go over to a friends tomorrow nite so no more billy no mates. She is great at putting me right, so can start fresh on monday.