uh... i hope sans speedo isn't a code word for commando.
((((( rick )))))
wow. when you talked about thinking of yourself as not married.. i have been thinking about that too. it's such a strange space because.. yes i am still married.. but it's not a M. and where do i go from here?
it seems like a lot of us are at a crossroad this weekend. lots of things happening and we all seem to be questioning what happens next.
it is possible to love and care about W while moving forward w/ your life. i know you will find that balance.
you are pretty awesome.. with or without those d#mn speedos!
Commando? In the spirit of leaping off the cliff in my new direction I guess I'm open to something new!
Barely...I wish I knew the answer for you, which if I did, would be the answer for me too. I'm going on blind faith here, mixed in with these small whispers I'm getting, and a pinch of logic. Also, I have to share a new lesson with my sons. They've seen me support her all along and understand that I am standing for my M, my love for her, despite the hardships. They also need to see what someone does to regain their own life, in a non-selfish way, and that someone is never too old to face their own issues and decide to grow with them, and take a chance in life. They and I need to see that there's unconditional love, but there has to be self-respect too, just not in an ego driven way.
I have trouble with the thought of moving forward as a no longer married person because I am not abandoning her, nor want this in a selfish way. The truth is though that I am not in a "married" relationship anymore. I'm not so much giving up on her as I am getting out of her way, and tackling the monsters that were in a closet I didn't consciously think about for years. In a way I'm doing the same thing as her, just in a very different way. As far as balance goes, I guess I will have to see how this goes. I really am in uncharted territory here.
Barely...I have a lot of respect for you. To go through this with the little kids has got to be so tough. But at least you have them and will help two more barely's go out into the world someday with all these fine examples of strength and honor from you.
You never told me what country you were born in? Okay, I know its in the far east somewhere...Hong Kong?
