Pur... me too. while going through therapy since Thailand (Oct) I realized this too. I knew it all along, but hearing myself talk honestly about how horrible I was to P, makes me sick. I've forgiven myself now, but I am still extremely remorseful. I was so horrible to him.
And re: moving to the condo? I am excited if I *have* to move. Yet even after all this I still hold on to some hope that we will come to terms in the couple of months we have left (or that I think we have left anyways).
I still have some hope that once he sees the strong woman who got ahold of her emotions as best as she could, that he would want to try and work it out. When and if that ever happened, THEN we could figure out the rest (meaning how I could trust HIM, and how HE could trust that my changes are long lasting and a work in progress).
Before the deployment, all we had was time. Now with the pending posting, time is short. Once he moves with the Army, it's over forever.
so anyone reading this. --- the statement said on these boards "time is your friend" believe it!!
