We have been talking quite a bit lately. I'm almost concerned that it's a little too much. She doesn't seem to mind, but for some odd reason I feel uncomfortable. We've been hanging out a bit too. I took her and the girls out to dinner for valentine's day.
The other night she spent the night at my place to help me look for cars (mine died and she has a knack for finding amazing deals on great cars). She had to go pick up some medicine. I couldn't tell if this was a legit reason or if she was getting away from me. I went to bed and she came back a bit later and went to sleep in the girls' room.
I have the girls this weekend. The girls wanted her to come to dinner with us, so we invited her and she came.
She's spending the night at my place again tonight. She's going with me tomorrow to look at some cars. Plus, the girls like it when she comes over and stays. I don't mind because it makes the girls happy.
There is nothing going on between us. In fact, I'm not sure where we even stand. We agreed to not have any R talks until we go to counseling...so that's what I'm doing.
During the conversation where she agreed to go to counseling, she said that I over- analyze things. She's told me a billion times I'm on her ass all the time. It's a pretty general statement and she gets upset when I ask for more details as to what she means. So, I've been trying to figure out what she means on my own. So, I started with overanalyzing, which led me to codependency and detachment.
I pulled her aside the other night after dinner and basically apologized to her for acting that way. I quickly explained that I can see how my behavior made her feel like I was on her ass all the time and not letting her be her own person. She said that it was okay. I told her that it wasn't because it caused a lot of damage between us. She agreed. I quickly ended the conversation so it wouldn't lead into any R talks.
So, she is angry at me. Is that why she keeps telling me that she wants to date other people, but is still somewhat holding on to the M? I can't tell if she's serious about that or if she's trying to see how I will react. She knows that bothers me.
I've told her that dating other people is where I draw the line. She doesn't seem to be dating right now. I haven't brought it up for a couple reasons... 1.) I look needy 2.) I look insecure 3.) That is what she is referring to when she says I'm on her ass and overanalyze things 4.) If I'm going to lovingly detach, I have to let her make whatever decisions she is going to make. She knows how I feel and what the consequences are.