Quote: You state that truly letting go means not worrying about whether or not your S comes back and realizing that its Okay to move on with your life.
OK, I'll agree with that..
Quote: Yet you also infer that dating is a great tactic to get your S to stand up and take notice.
. Yes, I'll agree it may have that affect, if they care about losing you..
Quote: ..if you are viewing dating this way, then you can't say you have truly let go can you?
Thats where we differ. I can totally have let go, moved on, dated and found the new mate of my dreams without any wishful intention of it having an affect on my winning back my WA. Its not me dating, its how me dating is perceived by my WAW. If she catches wind of it, and all of a sudden she sees that I could be serious about someone new, and she all of a sudden wants to pursue or "work things out" because deep down she doesn't want to lose me, thats her choice. Then it becomes MY choice if thats what I still want. Or, she may not give a hoot if I'm dating, because she doesn't love me anyway or whatever, so be it. Letting go, is letting go of the need to have things work out in an M that is going south, knowing you're going to be fine no matter what happens. Personally, I'll date because I'm ready to start a new R. Now, if the repercussions of that miraculously has my W interested in me for whatever the reason, I can't control that, thats her feelings. I've still let go regardless, and any decision I make about her sudden advances, won't differ from any other important decisions I have to make.
Dating like any other advice on this board, is to be used with discretion. It may not be for everybody's sitch, nor will it fix what ails the M, its just happens to sometimes hit a chord in a WA that may just have them reconsider things, if they don't want to lose us, especially when "the book" isn't by itself helping to get your partner to reconsider. . You instantly become more attractive when you are sought by someone else. You instantly become more attractive when you are happy, confident, upbeat and in control of the sitch and your life outside the M. Thats just the facts maa'm... Nothing insures success, all I'm suggesting is giving you a fighting chance to stop a runaway train along with the other methods Michele has preached.
Good luck Cindy, I now you return your sitch to your fellow DBers..
Nothing insures success, all I'm suggesting is giving you a fighting chance to stop a runaway train along with the other methods Michele has preached. 
