Glad to hear that you're making positive progress, Val. It sux letting go of someone who meant so much to you, but it sounds to me like you realize that you put too much of yourself into your W and your R. I did that myself, and I now find that in the wake of my W's absence, my identity is growing to replace those missing parts of me. I believe that I'm now more of an individual than I ever was when I was with W, and you may find yourself becoming the same.
Also glad to hear that your V-day went well. Friends are so very awesome.
I would suggest reading "Wherever You Go, There You Are" by Jon Kabat-Zinn. You sound like you think a great deal. While that can help us figure stuff out, it can also further entrench us in pain and anger, too. I am currently reading it and am learning so much about how thoughts can often mindlessly dictate our experience.
