Bklyn Queen

[labug]

Bklyn,

Then I sit through the meeting. And it changes again. I realize I didnt act perfectly but I acted reasonably and without anger. i dont need to apologize. I can recognize that my behavior wasnt ideal and next time I can maybe react differently. I realized H actions contributed to my negative feelings, I dont need to own the entire exchange. H needs to see that his role as a father is different now that he is not at home.

Yes! Yes! Yes!

I think your email, with 2's changes is good. No blaming or shaming, just facts.

H,

Initially when you mentioned having D3 see a child psychologist I was very reluctant. I did not want anything to be "wrong" with our perfect little girl. Maybe I was in denial. Every night she cries inconsolably for you. I always tell her Daddy loves you and you will see him soon but I need help as to the appropriate way to handle this.

I have not mentioned these instances because I dont want to put the girls in the middle. And I also have not mentioned these instances because I didn't want to upset you. But in keeping that from you I was not being honest and we both deserve, and should expect honesty in co-parenting issues. Alanon has helped me realize that it serves no purpose to protect you from the pain. I know that we both want what is best for them.

A therapist could help guide us with regard to work and also if we should even be considering taking away the binkies and bottles.

You and I can begin researching child therapists. When we find one we are both agreeable to we can schedule an appt and go from there. What do you think??

Bklyn


I think I would put a time limit on the research phase but give him some responsibility in this.

I'm usually not a good one to draft these kinds of emails because I seem to fill them with landmines. Thought I'd take a stab.