Bravado, huh? More like freaking frustration!!! Not at you, you help me think things out. I'm just frustrated at how uncertain the situation is and how often h fluctuates. I meant nothing personal by my 'tone' of email ! No, really!
Quote: Curious, did you always put him first back then? Would you say you were more "appreciative", "grateful" and "compassionate" towards him then versus how he maintains you aren't now?
No I was not. I didn't give a fig for what he was going through, what he was doing. We lived together, had sex, but did not share anything else. I was busy with kids, my degree, Army training and did not pay any attention to him at all. If I didn't like something he did I told him to f*** off and once even moved out and turned off all the lights, water and electric in the house on him during a blizzard! Back then I was all about me and didn't give a fig about him. I was very tough and meaner than hell to everyone THEN, of course not now ! I'd sooner say f*** off than good morning back then.
I've definitely chilled out since my stint in the military but have yet to really validate him as a man. To understand that he has feelings too...feelings of rejection, fear, being unloveable, scared to be a dad....a lot of things that I do not take into consideration when making a decision.
This is what he's getting at....he wants to be needed.
I pray I'm not way off base...but then if I end up divorced then I guess I was off base, huh? Oh, well all I can do is give him space, be kind to him, consider his feelings, not pressure him with r talks, keep him informed about the boys' activities, and be FUN for God's sake! I'm sure to score some points that way, right?
Thanks for your help, Wiley. Don't leave me cause I do appreciate your input very much. You give me much to think about it with your replies.
! No, really! 
