I am sitting in Panera Bread in sunny Greensboro. It's beautiful here today! And I have a smile on my face! Plus, I almost ate a whole meal, plus half a chocolate chip cookie! Go me!
The calls and texts between H and I have been mostly initiated by him. I only called once last night because he was supposed to call me, but I figured the later it got, that he had forgotten about the time difference. He actually thanked me for calling to remind him! LOL (Seriously though, I'm trying really hard to let him call me. Its worked so far!)
He texted me this morning to say have a safe trip and I love you. This is seriously different from a few weeks ago when he went out town for a funeral. Not sure what's going on, and trying, REALLY TRYING, not to read anything into it.
I am trying to brace myself mentally for the chance he comes back and says he's moving out. (His original thought was by the beginning of March) I know its still a possibility, and being that I was encouraged NOT to ask him about it, I'm planning for it just in case.
You know, a 6-hour drive gives you lots of time to think. I realized this morning that even with being in this situation, I am a much happier person than I was before, when I was trying to change to be what I thought my husband wanted me to be. Now that I'm doing it for me (mostly anyway), I don't complain about stuff as much; little things that happen at work don't spin me up as much; and I overall am a more patient person than I ever was (not much more, but there has been some progress LOL).
I don't know whether it's the sunshine or what, but I will take this feeling today!
