New trying to DB-Help!

[Truegritter]

yes, I'll have to cross that bridge if I get to it...

I guess you missed my sarcasm in pointing out the fact you are letting your W make your choices for you.

DO you want to tell your children that?

DO you want to tell yourself that?

Does it let you off the hook for making a harder choice?

So you can blame her for the demise of your M?

I want someone to hold and share both fun times and sad. I want someone I can trust again after having my trust in W shattered.

How about loving her that way?

This is the sad times right now J. So how would you want to be loved if you were having a difficult time? If you were confused? If you were scared?

If you felt so scared you didn't know how to show your W or want to show your W that you care.

So much that you couldn't even throw her a crumb?

If you had stumbled and needed forgiveness?

I want not to feel this constant pain and anguish that my WAW is causing me right now due to her being "done" with us right now.

Then don't feel that way. It is YOUR choice how to react to her. I am not talking about feelings. Those spontaneous impulses that react to stimulus. We can't control feelings and emotions by their very definition.

To quote a poster who used to be here named Coach:

"The prisons are full of people who acted on their feelings and emotions."

A stronger man controls his.

A man with courage and integrity chooses not based on what someone is doing or not doing to him or for him.

He chooses from his values. from his core of who he chooses to be.

So which would you rather your children be witness to?

this

I want to stick it out, even if it isn't in my best interest right now. that's enough for now.

Why is it NOT in your best interest right now?

This is the ultimate opportunity for you. You're best interest is staring you in the face.

How is making a choice to act and choose from your own values not in YOUR best interest?

If you leave this up to her you'll be the victim of HER choice.

What is YOUR choice. No buts. No leaving it to timelines or lack of sex, or a day on the calendar:

And especially not to your confused beloved W.

YOU?

WHAT DO YOU WANT J?