Time is not the measure of when to move forward. Everyone has their own reasons why they choose to stand in their M and relationship.

Personal choice.

This process of healing as an LBS (MLC or not) is just that.

It takes time. How long? depends.

The challenge for the LBS is to move through those stages and achieve clarity, compassion, forgiveness and finally to let go.

A decision made from the place of understanding and love enables the LBS to move forward in a healthy manner.

I don't think you get there by letting your spouse or what they are doing or not doing at ANY TIME make that decision for you.

You make a choice from a place of strength not weakness.

If you have refused to look at behaviors (denial) then you are stuck.

Only when you look at the brutal reality and own it and your part in it can you move on with strength.

If there is ANY reason including time that makes your choices for YOU then you got more work to do...

Just my opinion of course.

My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am