Well ... I'm back

[MHL]

TPC,
I have been off the boards for awhile and a little bird told me you were back here posting.

Good to hear from you.

Let me start by saying that I think that you are moving through a process currently and it is more about YOU than your wife or your marriage.

Your wife, your marriage and even your kids are the lens through which you are viewing YOUR LIFE right now. You are evaluating your life, your faith, your mental state, YOUR HAPPINESS through the people around you........

Try to stop that or at least shift it for a while.

So much of what you are communicating about YOU is external to you but yet you are internalizing it and letting it knock you off course.

I am going to paraphrase from a book I recently read that helped me. (BTW, No More Mr. Nice Guy is similar) The book I recently read is "The Way of the Superior Man" by David Deida. In his book Deida describes that as a man you should have some sort of ultimate purpose in life....and that should set your course in life, much like a ship in the ocean.

So Deida, says that we are the ship on the ocean and the ocean or more specifically the waves are our wives (girlfriend for me). Yeah guess what.....its no lala land of endless, magnificent adoration, affection, and sex out here in single land. I too still struggle with relationships with my current girlfriend, whom I love.

Anyways, the women in our lives are constantly trying to knock us off course. They do not do it consciously but make no mistake about it.....IT IS A TEST to see if they can change your course.

Case in point......you ride competitively. Sometimes your are encouraged by your wife.....sometimes not. You ride for you, for the benefits of health, mental and male bonding.....BRAVO!!! Congratulations on KNOWING what is good for you. WHY WOULD YOU EVER BE DETOURED FROM THAT?????? You go out of your way to not have this most important thing in YOUR life not impact your family. This is good also, however you are letting their TESTS effect you.

STOP. Do not listen to their words, watch their actions. Sometimes the actions take a couple of days to come out.....be patient.

More later.....have to run now.

Hang in there.

Cheers