Looking backward but only to move forward SEVEN

[sage]

We have been to counseling in the past.

We went for about a year (maybe less time?) well before the bomb dropped. We slogged through a lot of stuff and then it became clear that the time outside the sessions was what was helping us most so we stopped.

At the time the bomb dropped in 2002, I was in counseling alone. He came with me for one session post-bomb and it was clear that it was going to do more harm than good. He went to one counseling session solo (different therapist) and didn't return.

A few years ago (maybe just last year?) he went to another therapy session solo after he had a crazy blow up to something really, really trivial.

He is very anti-therapy. I am not. although I do believe that our marriage got back very much on track with just DB'ing.

The problem is now that it seems REALLY clear we have some things we really need to talk about. The communication problems are on both sides...I struggle to tolerate his reactions (lots of anger, lots of lashing back then complete silent treatment for DAYS) so I tend to shy away from bringing up issues. I've just described HIS communication issues in the ( ).