"This is one of the most frustrating things at the moment, I am slogging my guts out to improve, for myself, for my kids and for her. She has not done anything,"
She doesn't have to do anything. It's her choice.
"What I'm selfishly concerned about is I could become a model H for her but what about my needs? What about her truly taking responsibilty for the parts shes played and and where shes gone wrong rather than giving me lip service that she has."
If this is how you feel, then you're going to fail. It's not about YOUR needs anymore. Didn't you mention that you were selfish, etc. and that's what drove her away? When you talk about your needs, you're doing the same. Which is why you get angry (which is the same reaction). No one is saying that your W hasn't had her share of issues, but right now YOU'RE the one who wants to save the marriage and she doesn't. So unfortunately you're going to have to be the one to do the heavy lifting.
[censored] but true.
If you choose to be the initiator, you're going to have to increase your patience.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
