Husband wants out & has one foot out the door - P2

[25yearsmlc]

I'd amend that only slightly Brian/Roro...


IF an A were a one night stand OR
a short term fling,

OR if I knew things were bad between us and there wasn't a surprise (like he wasn't pretending all was well when it's clearly not-like a serial cheater would)

OR like a Gaslight h would.

OR if we had separated, then it'd be much easier to cope with

than if there has been long term affair --which requires repeated, long term, lying & planned deceit.

I have no answer for you there. For me, that situation would be a deal breaker

not punitively but simply b/c I know I could not trust him again in the future...regardless.

And that lack of trust is a dealbreaker. I Could still love him and think he is a good dad (or not, depends) and co-parent,

but as a wife--a woman w/my values--

if I feel I've been fooled over time, and at times when he acted as if all was well with us,

I could not see ME being able to cope with that. He'd have to have a brain tumor or weird psycho condition that explains it AND THAT is fixed...get a CAT scan?

Sorry if this isn't what you wanted but you did ask...and hey

There is a book called "after the Affair" that I did not read but heard was helpful...