Being, I understand what you say about wanting to matter.
I think, in my case, that we were doing this high school thing of looking over our shoulders to see if the other person was watching.
I could not figure out how to break out of that. To a certain extent I think this game is still played as X always has a way of mentioning his achievements to me.
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D