nh, don't beat yourself up, it happens. I had a moment like that last week. You've gotten advice from senior members here, but I would also say to proceed with caution. It sounds like your H was jolted by your melt down, but please realize that as suddenly as he started talking about a "fresh start," he may stop and go back to where he was before. Because his about-face seems to be in response to extreme emotion or fear, it may not last when all the emotions have calmed down. Or it may. You just don't know yet.

I am a little concerned that he doesn't want to take it one day at a time and wants to know "right now" if it will work. It doesn't seem like he is willing to work with uncertainty or to face the tough issues in your marriage or in his life. If he just wants an instant fix, what will happen when you have a fight, or he has some doubts, or he sees the OW and wonders "what if?" Will he immediately think, "well, I gave it a shot and it's not working out"?

I think your impulse to take it slowly is a good one, and I really hope this leads to a reconciliation that you are happy with.

Mimi

M:37; H:37; M:10 years;T:13 years;no kids.
Bomb ("I love you, but don't feel things for you I should":1/08/12
Separated (H living with various friends:1/18/12
Separated (H rented his own apartment:3/4/12