You are not a family of 4 anymore, you are a family of 3. I don't think it is a good idea to encourage the "family feeling" when it isn't what is happening in you and your ex's lives.
I know I probably bothered you about you not being ready to date. I still stand by that. There was an interesting article on another site I participate on and I posted in on the alt. It addressed wether or not you were ready to date. I am paraphrasing but the 2nd point was, I am over my ex and no, I am not hoping to get back together with them. You yourself have said that that isn't a true statement for you. It is fine to be in a group, hanging out with a friend or two, hang out by yourself. Time and work will get you where you need to be.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory