Together Since We Were 15...Now Piecing

[Jenna333]

He keeps snooping on my phone He isn't trusting that I'm in this 100%. We're both fearing the same thing about each other's intentions. I'm not snooping on him anymore, though. He was so clingy and cuddly lady night, and kept complaining that he was telling me he loves me and I wasn't saying it back. I was asleep! I think he just feels very vulnerable now that he's let me know that I have the power in the relationship and that he's basically at my mercy. I really wish he wouldn't look at it like that.

I'm having a hard time fighting thoughts that he left me to see if he could be with the coworker, and when she ended up not feeling more than friendship for him, he came back to me. He denies that he left or came back for those reasons. He said he was numb and fed up when he left, and soon after leaving he'd been wanting to come back, and it showed.

I need to find a way to cope with these thoughts and feelings. He told me he wants me more than he could have ever wanted her. I don't know, I feel guilty for not leaving all of the crap regarding the coworker in the past when I remember what I put him through for YEARS when I thought I was in love with 2 people. I guess I'm worried I'll go through what I put him through. He never should have put up with it. I never would. I wish he didn't have to work with her anymore. He said the most they interact anymore is saying hey while passing each other. He tells me I have absolutely nothing to worry about. He's never cheated and never would. He wants me back more than anything and that I have to trust him.

I do want this. I know he does.