I feel that I need to write W a letter explaining where I am at. Due to her actions we will never be a family again and we will never be friends again, if she keeps this up we won't even be civil. Thoughts
I feel that I need to write W a letter explaining where I am at. Due to her actions we will never be a family again and we will never be friends again, if she keeps this up we won't even be civil. Thoughts
Go ahead and write it, but don't do it for the wrong reasons...
Write it, seal it up, and run it through the shredder...
This isn't about what she has or hasn't done. It is about what you can do or you cannot do now.
It is time to mourn the loss of your marriage. It is time to find yourself again.
You need to go through the 6 stages of grief. You need to feel it, every bit of it. You need to own those emotions so that you can become whole again. Not for her, not for the marriage, but for you, so that you have something in the future to give to your next relationship.
No person knows what the future holds. And if you did, can I get the lottery numbers from you ???
mr mr, write the letter. For me writing helps get the crap outside of me and I feel better after having done that. I think cathartic is the word.
Don't send it, never put anything in writing that might turn around and bite you in the butt. Take the high road because it seems that she would use anything to help her position. Be very careful what you choose to say to her and don't let your hurt, fear, anger get the best of you.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
Ok so don't send the letter, but should I communicate in any way how dangerously close she is to pushing civility out of our future? Or should I sit back and let the chips fall where they may. I feel like I'm dealing with a toddler. Ok, she's an adult, she will have to walk this path without my direction and let the chips fall where they may. Everyone on board? I'm too chaotic in the brain to be sure of anything.
"I feel like I'm fighting my life right now. There are so many changes happening and I am angry that I can't focus on any one of them- instead, I have to juggle them all at once... and I'm alone. "
This is exactly how I feel right now ! Thanks for writing it for me- I don't think I would have been able to. Thanks for the clarity Purg.
Don't try to communicate anything about how this new sitch makes you feel!
She didn't expect news like that to make you feel all warm and cozy inside! Who the heck knows why she really did it!! WAS's can be very strange and sometimes horrible creatures!!
It's not worth your time! You should definately avoid all contact unless it has to do with the kids and set your boundaries (ie, keeping the kids overnight so you don't have to see her much) and stick to them!!
Me31 H33 M11 T15 S10, D4 H deploys 01/11 H R&R two weeks 10/11 ILYBNILWY/sep 12/11 homecoming 1/12 pos D 1/13
So W picked up kids tonight and she sent a text saying to have them ready, which I did, so she gets here and my son goes out and comes back in saying that mom wants to see his puppy. A few minutes later I get a call from W asking me to come get the puppy and that why does this always happen, why can't I have the kids ready ...........I lost it, said I had the kids ready and that she wanted to see the puppy. After that it's a blurr. Anger spewed out of me, I went out and got the puppy, opened her door and calmly said a little respect would go a long way.
Called my D18 and vented and calmed down, realized that while I am justifiably angry at her I did not handle it well so I sent a text saying that I didn't behave properly a.d that I apologized.
Hey mr. There is a fellow DBer called Country Song. He went through the same thing. I wish he would chime in or maybe u could look up his thread. My heart goes out to you and the kids.
M 53 D 20 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”
