A word on dating, and match.com....It's not it's all cracked up to be!
I've been what I like to call " window shopping" on match.com and a few other sites. Though I have made a very good friend through one site, Im not impressed. Maybe if I were 18 years old it would be fun, but after a long term marriage, and two kids starting over seems exhausting.
And yes the kids do watch you. My oldest daughter saw I was online looking at profiles and she got very upset. As it turns out she's holding out that xh will stop what he's doing, get his head straight about him and we'll get back together. We had to have a long talk about that one.
The kids are not happy with what xh has chosen to do, but have been forced to accept it because they miss him and want a relationship with him. I must let that serve as a reminder to me how things were in the past with him. I remember him having such a busy social life and when I asked for some time with him, his excuse was if I wanted time with him I should just follow him around.
Sheesh and here I am feeling sorry for myself because tomorrow is Valentines Day and I have no one. 22 years ago it was Valentines Day that my Xh stole my heart for good. One dozen roses, balloons, a huge stuffed animal and a box of candy delivered to me at school my Senior year. So many other sweet things for Valentines since. I even got something last year.
Im glad for this board. I guess I feel kinda foolish that he went out and got what he wanted while Im still here at home keeping the kids and I intact as best as I can. Im still heart broken, lonely, and feel so disconnected from life at times. But I see we all feel that way. Look at what they left us with?
