Waiting for the tides to change - 2

[BFloat]

H and i exchanged a couple of txts today. he was asking how the "party" was for the kids. and then he just sort of.. disappeared. so weird.

so i decided to email H about spring break and my plans w/ the kids. i mainly emailed because i wanted to pull S5 out of school a week early as the hotel we are wanting to book isn't available the week he is actually out of school the strange thing is, it seems it's only our school district that is 1 week spring break rather than 2 like everyone else. anyway, in the past, i have always made those types of decisions myself and would just let H know. this time i thought, maybe i should be discussing this with him since he may have strong objections. there's my 180 for the day.

i've been thinking about my trip to ocean shores. in a way i'm nervous because it would just be myself and the kids for 3 nights. it's not that i'm nervous w/ just being with the kids.. i'm just wondering how i'm going to feel because it's similar to trips we've taken as a family and it will be the very first trip i've ever taken w/ the kids w/out H. but thinking about long walks on the beach.. quiet dinners.. watching movies.. reading while listening to the ocean.. it seems oddly comforting and there's a sense of "i'm doing it myself" that i'm looking forward to. it's a mixed bag of emotions.

need to start planning my GAL activities for next weekend. just have to keep busy when i'm away from the kids. can you believe it? the weekend has just ended and i'm already trying to plan the next one.