Wife in "D - Freight Train Mode"

[25yearsmlc]

I think it's b/c your progress and growth are not liner really. You evolve, backslide, and skip forward, or plow slowly some days...

But when you step back from the forest and you can see the trees--your growth

insights, are self evident.

Give yourself an internal deadline (just for you to know) that will be the light at the end of the tunnel.


In say 6 months or a year (If those time lines made you groan then at least go for 90 days) so she can sense consistent change in You of sufficient duration...

THEN when the "deadline" comes up you reassess and ask yourself how things are going.

"Do I still want this m to be restored (not just "to last" but to be happy in it??)--has she shown signs of change?

IF I still want the marriage, that does not mean "I want it, at any cost"--remember that.


How long can I endure this or worse?

If I filed it, how would my life look?

**NOTE you can re-set your deadline too! DO another 90 days of DBing and GAL and DETACHING with another deadline...

This deadline YOU will have means you wont' let yourself be in limbo forever.

Embrace your ability to choose. You are not powerless.

You can walk away any time and the world will keep going and YOU WON'T DIE...

Knowing my legal/financial rights helped ease a lot of fears. I'd suffer some but we would make it. Find out what your sitch really would be for you.

I'd be happy either way. [bYou need to Get to that place (mentally and emotionally) and savor it.[/b]

If you get w back, you'll be in a better place to partner w/her

and if not, you're still in a better place.

Keep on keeping on..Your life is moving even if you can't feel it...