When I give her more space, she gets upset. I actually went for several weeks of not having sex or being physical beyond hugging -- I actually felt quite good during that period, while my W got increasingly upset about it. In the end she got really upset and said I was depriving her of the opportunity to make me happy.

When I give space, she thinks something is wrong and gets very anxious. I'm ready to give space, I've had thoughts of moving out lately.

On the other hand, I second guess myself. It's not like she's not trying at all -- she's not cold or unpleasant, she's just not engaged to the degree that I am and that bothers me.

I appreciate your help Cadet, my sitch is difficult but I realize could be much worse. When I give space she feels like I'm punishing her -- even if I'm happy and upbeat while doing so.

A lot of DB applies when you have a WAS -- I think the rules for piecing are different and there is no book for that. A sequel is called for.

Accuray

Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced
M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11
Start Reconcile: 8/15/11
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced)
In a New Relationship: 3/2015