Received an email from W on Monday saying that she still hasn't received payment for January and wants to know about December.
I'm trying to be patient for the answers from my free lawyer friend.. but I don't think I will get it any time soon. However I did find out that the reinstatement finally went through.
The email brought up a ton of emotions for me. In the end, I can see why she wrote it. I guess it also explains the text from Saturday.
I feel pretty at peace with my decision to not pay for December, and only pay what I would pay for Cobra. (This amount is about $100 less because her company adds a family fee).
I know if my heart that I would not hurt my w intentionally. It just sukks that my actions with be "hurtful" to her.
I struggle with writing my response email.
The first and obvious reason is - I am scared of w's response. She is not going to be happy. I'm sure she is going to fight back. It's scary to think about all the ways she can respond.. especially given our past two months.
Am I strong enough to handle the venom, or the guilt. I hope so. I actually pray that my heart can remain loving.. and no matter what... remember that I am doing a loving thing by not stopping her from feeling her consequences.
No matter what she says.
The second is that...I'm just having a hard time finding the words. I have no desire to punish my w for what she has done... I'm just losing my desire to protect her. I feel like saying "Hey this is your bed, lie in it".....
...but at the same time, everything I write to her feels like it's coming across as punishment. I feel there needs to be some explanation to why I am not going to pay for it.
IDK - Maybe it's not even possible to construct such an email.
This is what I have.
------------ W. The check is in the mail. You should receive it in the next day or two.
The check is for $X. This is the amount I would pay if I was on Cobra. This is the amount I will continue to pay until I am able to go on Cobra.
I will not be paying for December. You illegally took me off of your insurance and I do not feel I should pay because your job discovered this information and reinstated me.
Payment was late because I was waiting for final confirmation from Healthnet that the reinstatement process was fully complete . From this point forward, payment will be sent out at the end of every month.
I will be in contact again once I receive all of my tax info so we can schedule a time to file them for the 2011 year.
Val
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Brr.. it's cold.. but honestly I don't know how else to put it.
Help please?
M(f): 43 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
