Dinner with my W next week has been planned and is on. My saga is in another thread (new to DB-Help). I plan to go and just listen to her and not bring up R at all and see what happens. We sleep together but no romance at all for about a month. We are like roommates with kids for now, but talk about daily life and kid's, etc. No talk about R or EA/OM if I can help it and she never brings it up.
Any advice? Should I get a card/flowers. It's pursuing I know, but we do have a "date" set for Valentines. Thanks!
M 43, W 40 T 22. M 14 D 14, S 9, S 8 DD 11/21/11 Retrouvaille 4/13/12--and the healing begins as we begin a new journey together!
jlove, you might be "safe" with the standard / lame card and chocolates for the "date". Don't go over board I think. Keep it low key, like this is one of the first dates the two of you have ever had.
jlove, you might be "safe" with the standard / lame card and chocolates for the "date". Don't go over board I think. Keep it low key, like this is one of the first dates the two of you have ever had.
Oh yeah... and make sure YOU PAY for the date!
Yes, I'm paying of course and thanks, was thinking the standard was called for here. Think it be strange if I gave her nothing. I'm just going to sign the card, "love, Jlove" with no other comments.
M 43, W 40 T 22. M 14 D 14, S 9, S 8 DD 11/21/11 Retrouvaille 4/13/12--and the healing begins as we begin a new journey together!
Given the state of our situation (her on the road moving out of state this week, leaving petition for dissolution on the counter), I wasn't planning on doing a thing. Other than saving money!!
Me: 36 Her: 35 Together 7/09 Married 8/7/10 Separate rooms since at least April 11 "I've decided I want a divorce" 12/5/11 She moves out of state/files 2/7/12 Dissolution final 5/12
I'm stressing over this significantly. I've already taken a poll and given my sitch specifically (always been over the top with the gifts given that is her love language) and the feedback I've received, my plan is to do nothing. But then we hung out on Sunday and she was talking about Valentines Day, potentially "fishing". Given the situation with the stepkids I am thinking I'm going to do a card for each of them, given that they didn't decide to eject me from their lives.
I've read in some people's sitch's that the feedback is to do something but not go over the type. Given I am in LRT mode although not doing well at it, my stance with her again is going to be to do nothing and just do a card for the stepkids.
Good luck to everyone!
me 38 W 30 T 3 M in 05/2010 Separated 08/2011 Stephchildren (all hers) SS17, SS12, SD8 I filed 8/27, she countered I filed response 9/5 Anxiously waiting on the judge!
WAW and I are friendly so I think i'm just going to get a generic card that says Happy V Day, love me. Was thinking about getting it and holding on to it to see if she gets me anything and if so then give it to her and if not, keep it to myself.
I think I will ignore it. We've never done gifts for V day, but usually went out to dinner. Last year we decided to save $$ by not doing fancy dinners for a while, so we might not have done much this year anyway. Plus, on of H's big emotional issues is having obligations and duties toward others. So needless to say, I don't think hinting around about V day would go over well. Definitely pursuing in my case.
M:37; H:37; M:10 years;T:13 years;no kids. Bomb ("I love you, but don't feel things for you I should":1/08/12 Separated (H living with various friends:1/18/12 Separated (H rented his own apartment:3/4/12
